1-1-1 Taking Charge of your 20's

The Defining Decade, Ryan Holiday on TKP, 100 blocks a day

January 21, 2022

Hi, Dhairya here👋

Welcome to the 45 new members who have joined Dhairya’s Newsletter since last to last Friday. Join the 237 others who are receiving it every single week.

Major Updates:

I started writing this newsletter bi-weekly covering 2-2-2, but starting this week you’ll receive it every Friday 1-1-1.

Today at glance:

Book: The Defining DecadePodcast: Ryan Holiday at TKPArticle: 100 blocks a day Suprise:)

The Defining Decade

The Defining Decade by Meg Jay is the most important book if you’re in your 20’s. This book centers around Jay’s experience as a clinical psychologist seeing people in their 30s and 40’s struggling in career and life due to ‘lack of vision’ in their 20’s. This book guides you to reflect upon the mistakes and lessons you need to keep in mind.

I enter my twenties last month and last week I found this as a recommendation to read, and it’s the best time to start:

This book is in two sections: Work(career) and Love(relationship), In this edition, we’ll look into lessons from Work.

Here are five important lessons:

Identity Capital

Many people in their 20s aren’t building up any of them by sitting around at home or taking dead-end jobs. GPA and college degrees don’t really count, since everyone has them

Jay’s Advice: take the job with the most career capital. Where you’ll build the most relationships, learn the most, grow the most. NOT necessarily make the most money.

Weak Ties

Weak Ties: The person you met on Twitter, a founder, a marketer, developer, etc.Strong Ties: Your comfort group.

Jay’s Advice: build up your network of weak ties, instead of only spending time with your close friends. It’s the people you rarely talk to who might lead to fortuitous relationships down the road, and you want that broad exposure.

The Unthought Known

You'll have that one dream that you've always wanted to achieve but haven't been able to due to life's technicalities.

Jay’s Advice: Introspect and try to find what you know about yourself but are afraid to admit to yourself. What do you want deep down, but don’t know how to get, or are afraid you’ll fail at?

My Life Should Look Better on Twitter & Instagram

You try to be cool and impress people on social media, but you never notice the problem that comes with focusing on it.

Jay’s Advice: Stop focusing on glory or impressing other people, focus on what you want to do with your life.

The Customized Life

People advise you to explore your twenty, try most things, but picking which right thing to explore is also important. You can’t be the right generalist if all your skills don’t align.

Jay’s Advice: You want your professional life to have a story, not just be a list. Picking your interests and talents and what you want to apply them to can create a story and a narrative that you bring to interviews and coffee dates. You need to decide what you want to focus on.

If you’re interested in reading the book, discussing it, and having collaborative notes with like-minded people, you can join my private WhatsApp group by signing here: Bookmarked!. You can buy it from here: The Defining Decade 

Ryan Holiday on TKP ft. Shane Parish

I would love to share two very valuable lessons I learned from it:

Ryan’s writing Process:

Ryan has already published five books and is currently working on three more. It's fascinating to see how he manages to write best-selling books year after year. His process:

  • Showing up every single day.

  • Keep the idea of the next project ready before starting one.

  • Reading, system to capture whatever he reads.

Success Paradox: The greater your success, the greater the cost of your mistakes.

The seeds of success plant the seeds of destruction because all the more obligations come in, more questions you get, more inbound, you have to learn to say no more and more otherwise it's going to prevent you from doing the very thing that made you successful in the first place. The irony of success is that there are infinitely more distractions from that success and as you get more successful the higher the price or bribe attached to those things is.

This episode is full of valuable lessons, if you wish to watch the full episode click here

100 Blocks a day

Daily on average, a person sleeps around 7-8 hours, leaving 16-17 hours awake each day. Or around 1000 minutes.

Let’s take 1000 minutes in from of 100 10 minutes block, that’s what you woke up every day. You spend these blocks until you eventually run out of it and go to sleep.

If you plot these blocks and form a grid and you start filling out each block how did you spend the time? Again do it tomorrow and fill all the grid how you spend the day.

The question to ask: How are the two grids different from each other, and why?

Full article read here | If you're interested in using this framework, take a look at this app: Block Time Tracker |

This weekend I would love to spend time with a few of you amazing folks, If you’re interested to meet 1:1 we can talk about books & anything:) You can block the time on calendly Looking forward to meeting some of the amazing people.

That’s it for the week!

If you enjoyed this, consider sharing it with your network so I can continue to grow this amazing community. Thank you for joining me on the journey!

Have a great week ahead!

Rooting for you ❤️

Dhairya

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